Over the past 12-18 months I have Been on quite a journey, and not an entirely pleasant one.
Let’s start at the beginning………
November 2017 I had just started a new job, and soon I found out I was pregnant for the 2nd time.
We were thrilled. Eliza, our first born, had been our world and so we’re very excited to be giving her a brother or sister.
This pregnancy was entirely different. My first had been a breeze, I had felt like wonder woman and enjoyed every second. This one I suffered. I was feeling drained from the very beginning and spending most of my time in bed. It was soon discovered I had an iron deficiency, and was very low in feretin, my iron stores. I was always dizzy, constant nausea, and feeling faint. It wasn’t too long that I then had to be signed off work, as I couldn’t stand for even an hour. (not great for a hairdresser)
Jump forward. June 13th 2018, she arrived. Another beautiful baby girl. I was overwhelmed with love all over again, my heart was full, she was perfect, and I was so proud to have brought her into the world. This day was heavenly. Baby Adelyn.
The weeks to follow my health once again was not so great. I was even struggling with feeding this time around. I was so sore I couldn’t bare to be touched, I couldn’t hold my baby and i couldn’t cuddle my eldest. I just felt like a failure. Surrounded by visitors, I had never felt so Alone.
…… And so it began. The clouds came in and my mind cluttered.
This part of my life is labelled POST NATAL DEPRESSION.